4 Words to Delete from Your MBA Application Essays

4 Words to Delete from Your MBA Application Essays Certain words or phrases appear in almost every MBA application essay. I’ve explained below why you don’t want to use 4 of these too-common words/phrases and what some alternatives might be. If you want to make your application stand out, do some editing and make sure to avoid these words completely. You might be surprised at the result. 1. HOPE e.g. I hope that you will accept me to your program. OR e.g. I hope to be able to obtain a management position with the help of your education. Why not? MBA schools are seeking confident applicants who know where theyre going, and believe in themselves. Your competitors know that theyll reach their goals; they see themselves as naturals for the school. Alternatives: My short-term goal is to become manager of financial analysis at a leading investment bank. OR My ability to take clear, decisive action, combined with MBA courses in strategic planning, will allow me to make an impact at ABC company from day one. OK, now we’re talking! 2. HIGH SCHOOL e.g. My most substantial accomplishment was leading the school drama club in high school. Why not? MBA applicants are expected to be professionals and current leaders. Writing about high school indicates that your leadership has been on a downward path, with less impressive things done in college and/or since graduation. Imagine a leading CEO you admire, and imagine him or her answering this question by talking about high school. (On a related note, remove any high school or earlier items from your resume.) Alternative: My leadership of a production quality team at my employer led to improvements that doubled gross margins. It’s obvious this person is someone impressive who should be seriously considered for admission. 3. WORLD-RENOWNED e.g. I am applying to your business school because of its outstanding reputation and world renowned faculty. Why not? Business schools with outstanding reputations don’t need to be told that you want to go there because of their outstanding reputations. Your goal is to differentiate yourself from the competition so why join every other applicants in describing the place or faculty as world-renowned? HBS applicants neednt talk about the schools world-renowned case study method, unless they want to be the same as every other applicant. Alternative: The schools unique marketing to China specialization matches perfectly with my short-term career goal, which is to start and lead a business unit at my familys firm focused solely on marketing to China. That’s so much better, isn’t it? 4. FEEL e.g. I feel that Ill be happy in the financial services business. Why not? Tell a school what you know is true, confidently; and do it as an adult, giving reasons, often based on research. Just as with the first word I discussed, hope, feel is a sign of lack of confidence. Say I intend, I know, etc. and explain why thats true. Start to project the aura of a leader. Would any CEOs that you know, lets say Donald Trump or Larry Ellison, ever speak that way while trying to sell themselves? Theyd do their homework, just as youll have to do during your MBA studies, and confidently state the results of their careful research. Alternative: The combination of my work experience as a financial analyst, my strong interest in investing, and conversations Ive had with management at XYZ financial services firm have led me to set a short-term career goal to move from the buy side to the sell side by joining a financial services firm as research associate. Delete these four words from your MBA application essays and I promise you more effective and powerful language will show up. Can you think of some other words to delete from your essays? Please share them in the comments. Need guidance in your MBA/EMBA Application process? Maximize your applications with help from The Essay Experts MBA Admissions Consulting Services. Or feel free to email me directly at larryessayexpert@gmail.com. Larry Sochrin

Pontiacs Rebellion and Smallpox as a Weapon

Pontiac's Rebellion and Smallpox as a Weapon Victory in the French and Indian War  had opened up new areas  of North America for British settlers. The previous inhabitants, France, hadn’t  settled to the extent that the British now tried, and had not impacted the Indian populations to a great extent. However, colonists now flooded into the newly conquered areas. Indian representatives made it clear to the British that they were unhappy with the number and spread of settlers, as well as the increasing number of British fortifications in the area. This last point was especially heated as British negotiators had promised that the military presence was only to defeat France, but they had stayed on regardless. Many Indians were also upset with the British apparently breaking peace agreements made during the French and Indian war, such as those promising certain areas would be kept for Indian hunting only.​ Initial Indian Rebellion This Indian resentment caused uprisings. The first of these was the ​​Cherokee War, caused by colonial infringement on Indian land, attacks on Indians by settlers, Indian revenge attacks and the actions of a prejudiced colonial leader who tried to blackmail the Cherokee by taking hostages. It was bloodily crushed by the British. Amherst, the commander of the British army in America, implemented stringent measures in trade and gift giving. Such trade was vital to the Indians, but the measures resulted in a decline in trade and greatly increased Indian anger. There was a political element to Indian rebellion too, as prophets began preaching a divide from European cooperation and goods, and a return to old ways and practices, as the way in which Indians could end a downward spiral of famine and disease. This spread across Indian groups, and chiefs favorable to Europeans lost power. Others wanted the French back as a counter to Britain. Pontiacs Rebellion Settlers and Indians had become involved in skirmishes, but one chief, Pontiac of the Ottowa, acted on his own initiative to attack Fort Detroit. As this was vital to the British, Pontiac was seen to take on a much greater role than he actually did, and the whole broader uprising was named after him. Warriors from a number of groups flocked to the siege, and members of many others- including Senecas, ​Ottawas, Hurons, Delawares, and Miamis- allied in a war against the British to seize forts and other centers. This effort was only loosely organized, especially at the start, and didn’t bring to bear the groups’ full offensive capacity.​ Indians were successful in seizing British hubs, and many forts fell along the new British frontier, although three key ones remained in British hands. By the end of July, everything west of Detroit had fallen. At Detroit, the Battle of Bloody Run saw a British relief force wiped out, but another force traveling to relieve Fort Pitt won the Battle of Bushy Run, and later the besiegers were forced to leave. The siege of Detroit was then abandoned as winter approached and divisions between Indian groups grew, even though they were on the brink of success. Smallpox When an Indian delegation asked the defenders of Fort Pitt to surrender, the British commander refused and sent them away. While doing so, he gave them gifts, which included food, alcohol and two blankets and a handkerchief which had come from people suffering smallpox. The intent was for it to spread among the Indians- as it had done naturally in the years before- and cripple the siege. Although he didn’t know of this, the head of British forces in North America (Amherst) advised his subordinates to deal with the rebellion by all means available to them, and that included passing smallpox-infected blankets to the Indians, as well as executing Indian prisoners. This was a new policy, without precedent among Europeans in America, one caused by desperation and, according to historian Fred Anderson, â€Å"genocidal fantasies†. Peace and Colonial Tensions Britain initially responded by attempting to crush the rebellion and force British rule onto the contested territory, even when it looked like peace might be achieved by other means. After developments in the government, Britain issued the  Ã¢â‚¬â€¹Royal Proclamation of 1763. It created three new colonies in the newly conquered land but left the rest of ‘the interior’ to the Indians: no colonists could settle there and only the government could negotiate land purchases. Many of the details were left vague, such as how Catholic residents of the former New France were to be treated under British law which barred them from votes and offices. This created further tensions with the colonists, many of whom had hoped to expand into this land, and some of whom were already there. They were also unhappy that the Ohio River Valley, the trigger for the French Indian war, was given over to Canadian administration. The British proclamation enabled the country to negotiate with the rebellious groups, although these proved messy thanks to British failings and misunderstandings, one of which temporarily returned power to Pontiac, who had fallen from grace. Eventually, treaties were agreed, reversing many of the British policy decisions passed in the aftermath of the war, allowing alcohol to be sold to the Indians and unlimited arms sales. The Indians concluded after the war that they could earn concessions from the British by violence. The British tried to pull back from the frontier, but colonial squatters kept flowing in and violent clashes continued, even after the dividing line was moved. Pontiac, having lost all prestige, was later murdered in an unconnected incident. No one tried to avenge his death.

Race and Your Community Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

Race and Your Community - Essay Example These forces all contribute to the racial attitudes of the people I know, as well as the leaders, in the small town where I live. Though I look like the majority, my heart and beliefs are a minority opinion. To begin this discussion, it should be noted that I believe that I live in a largely racist community. Minorities make up less than two percent of the total population, with just one percent African-Americans. Because of the low numbers of minorities, it is easier for the residents to carry on racist attitudes, while not ever confronting or experiencing any racial situations. Conversations are peppered with the N word and Latinos are usually referred to by using a racial slur. This is the acceptable attitude in this small town in the middle South. As a transplanted Caucasian Yankee, I was appalled and offended when I was first confronted by these attitudes, but as a newcomer I thought it would be a better strategy to keep my mouth shut and not talk out of school. Indeed, I often feel guilty for my silence and lack of courage. These attitudes have no doubt been handed down from the older generations to the children since the days of slavery. Yet, as I noted, there are no minorities t o be experienced first hand, and everything is simply learned through the social interaction of friends and families. As for me, I have always, and continue to feel, like an outsider when it comes to attitudes towards race. Though I look like 98 percent of the community, I have a very different attitude towards equality. I obviously cant know what a person of color feels when they hear a racial slur, but I know that it offends me and I am embarrassed to be in the company of people that use that language. This language also transfers to their other attitudes towards minorities in regards to their abilities, trustworthiness, honesty, or moral fiber. I am sure that I am also thought less of by these

The Treaty of Westphalia present new diplomacy in Europe Essay

The Treaty of Westphalia present new diplomacy in Europe - Essay Example However, this assertion has been frequently been under attack from revisionists and politicians. The former questions the importance of the Peace while the latter criticizing the system adopted by Westphalia sovereign states. Every nation, however small, had equal representation in the General Assembly of the United Nation with each having one vote. Membership of the United Nation grew from 50 since its inception to 192 at the start of twentieth century. Some of the members were former colonies of the founders of the United Nation thus serving their interest instead of the aspirations of their people (Darby, 2001). Discussion Desire for self-determination by most of the states took center stage in the post colonization such that other important issues such as confederacy were shelved. Westphalia marked the end of monarchs’ view that states were their property and also ensured that the sovereignty of other states was observed. Imperialism did not end even after the treaty since most of the European countries administered one rule to their people but to the countries outside Europe they administered different forms of administration. Countries that believe in equal sharing of natural resources view Westphalia state as an hindrance; there is no country which is determined to act unless on their personal interest and most of them are not ready to give power to any outsider for they believe that this could threaten their sovereignty (Nye, 2000). Due to the large number of participants with various conflicting interests, it is difficult to determine a specific pattern of negotiation; however the fundamental aims of the participants can be narrowed. The major aim of the emperor was complete and final conclusion of peace process for he desperately needed religious and territorial settlements. Mazarin’s desire for ultimate peace ended when Spain terminated their negotiation in1646. Spain wanted to reach to an agreement with the Dutch and continue the war ( Darby, 2001). According to the Germans, the French preferred destruction of the Emperor’s influence through installation of imperial institutions. This had many setbacks because most of these Emperors preferred Holy Roman Empire and an appetite for emperor who did not pay allegiance to the French and Sweden. Count Maximilian Von Trauttsmannsdorf did not have any problem in restating these demands to the French. France wanted parts of the Alsace, and Lorraine, but they were modest since France was determined to acquire Spanish territory (Waltz, 1979). Mazarin broke a deal in 1646 with the emperor to have Habsburg domains in Alsace for 1.2 million thalers. Due to Queen Christina’s desire for immediate settlement, the Swedes were ready for a compromise with her. However the French were concerned about Sweden becoming powerful. Mazarin constructed Brandenburg to back up Swedish power on the February of 1647 and the envoy to Sweden was urged to partition Pomerania. Due to t ension between the allies Trauttmannsdorf seized the opportunity to exploit them in many ways. In Habsburg, especially in Bohemian, Sweden expected religious compromise. When the emperor learned that the French had no sympathy for the Swedish Protestants he resisted any attempt to enforce these demands. In light of religion, issues pertaining to territory and allegiance were adequately dealt with in Peace of Prague and at the Diet of Regensburg; however status of Calvinism and secularized areas remained

Plato has Stronger Reasoning than Aristotle Essay examples -- Philosop

Plato and Aristotle Nearly all humans have the goal to live a virtuous and happy life. Two of the world most acknowledged philosophers, Plato and Aristotle, had their own views on this central issue. Plato supported the understanding view; he believed understanding is the key to living a virtuous life. Aristotle supported the habit and action view; he believed that individuals become virtuous by continuous moral actions. By and large both philosophers have a good standpoint; but in my judgment one has a stronger line of reasoning. Plato supports the view of understanding over custom and tradition. He believes that individuals should acquire the knowledge to understand something and then start performing the action. Plato says that once someone understands the good then he or she will do it; he says â€Å"...what we desire is always something that is good† (pg.5). We can understand from this that Plato is saying individuals want to do good for themselves; we perform immoral deeds, because we don’t have the understanding of the good. The lack of knowledge and understanding w...

Social Evils of India

India, the cradle of civilization, is now beset with a number of social evils. They are so numerous that one shudders to think of them. There have been social reformers like Raja Ram Mohan Ray, Maharishi Daya Nand and Swarni Shradhanand. They fought against social evils but these evils were so deep-rooted that try as they did some of them persist to this day. We may first take the position of women. Women do not enjoy a social position equal to that of men. The constitution does allow them equal status with men but it is all on paper.In practice they do not enjoy this equality. They are still treated as inferior to men. In villages which practically constitute seventy percent of the population, women are treated as second class citizens. Although they have been granted the right of voting, yet in practice they are still under the thumb of their men. They are mostly illiterate. In cities, however, they enjoy better status. We have teachers, professors doctors, lawyers, ministers and h igh officials and it is expected that with their education they would rise still high.Of course, it is a small fraction of women but with the spread of education it is expected that their condition would improve and they would work shoulder to shoulder with men. Another great evil is the dowry system. A man with a number of daughters is a cursed creature. Whatever he has is given away in marriages and he becomes a pauper. The dowry system has done a great harm to the social growth of Indian life. A man with a number of daughters has to sell his property or borrow money at a high rate of interest so that he might give a dowry to his daughter.In case he fails to do so his daughter has to hear taunts and harassment to such an extent that the poor girl is forced to end her life. Everyday we hear of the burning of young brides because of this harassment from their in laws or husbands. The sooner this social evil is removed, the better it will be for all concerned. Another great evil whic h is the bane of Indian life is child marriage. Marriage is a sacred institution and the persons going in for matrimony should be of marriageable age and not that either the girl is married to an old men or she is married at an age when she does not understand what arriage is. We hear of this social evil prevalent in Rajasthan where girls are married off at an age when they do not understand what marriage is. Some of them become widows before they know that they had been married off. A total war against these and a few other evils like drinking and smoking is of utmost necessity. There is legislation against these evils but they can be effectively checked only if the people decide to check them.

Speech On Marijuana Legalization - 972 Words

EXTEMPORANEOUS SPEECH MARIJUANA LEGALIZATION I dont use any illegal drugs, but I am opposed to the fact that marijuana is illegal. The main reason for that is that smoking marijuana is no more dangerous to the user than smoking cigarettes and no more dangerous to society than alcohol consumption. Yes, there are necessary limits to individual freedoms. Yes, marijuana should be regulated by the government and restricted from consumption by children. Yes, marijuana may be somewhat harmful to the user. But there is no logical justification for criminalizing marijuana while the use of other drugs with virtually identical risks is entirely permissible. Government has a legitimate concern to exercise its authority to protect society and the general public from behavior of individuals and government also has a limited right to exercise paternalistic authority to limit and regulate the types of risks to which individuals can expose themselves. For that reason, laws that criminalize drunk driv ing, for just one example, are completely justified. Otherwise, irresponsible personal behavior could put innocent people at great risk. Government also has the justifiable right to impose certain reasonable restriction on individuals for the general benefit of society and because certain types of personal risks can have significant costs to society. For example, the government can require car manufacturers to install seatbelts and require drivers to wear them because vehicularShow MoreRelatedSpeech on Marijuana Legalization1123 Words   |  5 Pages in the USA is that of the legalization of marijuana. This controversial topic is on the minds of our entire country. Whether or not to legalize marijuana has been a nation wide debate for years. In this informative speech I will be discussing only facts and opinions. 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